We have been doing some fantasizing out loud with each other. Invariably it leads to the notion of adding more “temporary partners.” I asked Jack in detail while he was fucking me of how he would want me to work on another woman for him. Hard kisses? Soft kisses? (hard!) Where should I kiss and be kissed? (mouth, neck, breasts, stomach, thigh, pussy) Should I be participating when he is having a go at fucking her himself? (oh yes, please) I think the consensus was no matter what, more enthusiastic involvement, kissing, sucking, licking, fingering and cooperating overall would be the most fun. I wonder what pussy tastes like? I’ll bet it tastes good with his cum in it, too.

I had fun sucking Jack’s cock the other day while he watched a strip-tease video on u-tube on my iPhone. I picked the video out for him. It was obviously a girl that knows how to do the tease. She happened to have a very nice ass that tantalizingly framed her tight underwear-clad pussy when she bent over (if somewhat disappointing tits). Geez, I wanted to take off her underwear. It makes me very turned on to know that I put this video in his head and he can get a hard on thinking about it. He can go back and look at it again and get off. I’ll be happy to suck him again if he wants to repeat the entire experience. I am in no way jealous that this girl gave him a thrill. I am thrilled, too.

Adding people to the bed is not something that we are planning (ever? yet?) and I know it is a move that involves a lot of risk. I don’t want to tank the relationship. I don’t want to introduce our life to someone untrustworthy or overly needy that cannot respect the boundaries of our relationship. I cannot risk our sex life interfering with the innocent and normal development of our kids. Let’s face it, even grown up, outside of their very existence, the kids never need to have any tangible evidence of our sex life. I definitely do not want to risk an STD or another lifelong illness. I have been careful and lucky enough to have not contracted so much as strep B from previous partners. I really do not want emotional entanglements that interfere with sex, our marriage, work, our platonic friends, health or our family. I don’t want to be ripped off.

I also thought hard about the sense of heterosexuality. I am securely hetero. I think what that means is that I want to pair bond and reproduce with my husband. I think a penis attached to someone masculine is very integral to my overall satisfaction. Casual sex? I think it can probably cross gender boundaries and not really affect your pair bond inclination. I believe that other than those people that “bat for the other team” after molestation and assault, sexual preference is an artifact of DNA, ingrained at birth. Do I get turned on looking at a woman? No, not really. I find I can evaluate her attributes rather clinically. Clearly if she is naked and behaving sexually I think of sex. I think of having the same experience she is having. What about having sexual contact with a woman? Would that be satisfying? Being a woman-on-woman virgin, I would have to say I think so, but mostly if Jack was there to participate and be turned on by it. Sexual contact is inherently pleasurable. Having someone explore and touch you, lick you, kiss you, suck you is pretty much always a good time. I think that for real pleasure, I want Jack to be watching. I want him to be absolutely, totally, crazy excited. I want him to have trouble deciding what to suck, grab or fuck next. I want him to be exhausted and satisfied to his very soul with two of us resting on his spent form. Maybe we’ll continue playing with each other, quietly fingering, kissing and caressing while he sleeps. After he sleeps for a while, maybe we’ll wake him up with two eager mouths exploring his cock. That excites me.

Emotional issues are a whole other consideration. What does happen to you when you do see your sig other boning a hot chick and they’re having a screaming good time? Is it as hot and sexy as it sounds or is it alarming? I imagine wanting to finally talk to someone else about how great he is. Akin to the thrill of writing about it and sharing it with you. I think that being in the same bed and participating makes this a very different experience from say walking in on them in full swing or wondering where he is on a Friday night. What happens to him if he sees you writhing with pleasure under some other woman or dude? I am betting there is a big difference for him if it is a woman.

I am not so insecure that I think that I will be suddenly found lacking in bed if Jack has other experiences. He has had other experiences and has chosen to stay here for two decades. I know how to fuck and I know how to make a man come, repeatedly. Are there other ways, other sensations other than mine that will make him come? Of course there are. Will he thoroughly enjoy a new pussy, ass, mouth, tits? Yes he will and he will think/dream about them fondly. Does Jack like to look at other women? Uh huh. Will she do it differently from me? Most certainly. None of this is concerning to me. I am sure I would bring up the events to add excitement to the times where we are alone and fantasizing. Am I missing something?

He has also expressed a fantasy of a party in which I am served up as a blindfolded and bound hors d’oeuvre for anyone that enters a particular room. I think if I could feel that there is some safety — personal and in our relationship, the notion of being fucked repeatedly by a lot of anonymous cock would be fun. I like cock and can generally go for hours. Having the cock disengaged with any other relationship to the strange man is appealing. Vibrators may feel nice, but there is nothing like a hot, throbbing cock to fill a pussy right. I also like the sensation of balls hitting me as the cock is being forced inside of me. Jack would of course get to start me and finish me off and enjoy what would be a very wet and swollen pussy.

I think that whatever we end up doing over the course of our sex lives, it will probably all be good if we stick together and experience it together. Right now, it is very, very fun to fantasize.

More later.